Biden and Ryan Share fake jabs and compare tattoos at media event.
DANVILLE, KY: The Biden and Ryan camps came together for a photo-op that was billed as, ‘the weigh-in before they weigh-in,’ event. Thousands turned out to see the two VP candidates trade mock jabs and dirty stares with one another.
“He’s got an ugly mug, I look forward to watching him squint in agony from my verbal barbs,” said the younger Paul Ryan. “He looks like a poster child for Botox, you know, the before picture?”
Joe Biden took the ribbing to heart. “Glad to see Ryan is over confident. It will serve my needs well when I show the voters how his budget is a fast ticket to the soup kitchen.”
Both the President and Mitt Romney had to interject a few times to stop the photo-op from turning into a brawl. “Hey, I’ve got to save my main man Joe for tonight! And if he doesn’t wait twenty four hours to respond like I did, we may actually win the debate.”
Romney tried to contain his enthusiasm from his recent spike in the polls. He massaged Paul Ryan’s shoulders, rinsed out his mouth guard and discussed how he and his running mate were considering matching tattoos.
The trash talking exhibited by both men stirred both Democratic and Republican pundits into a frenzy. Al Sharpton took the event one step further and spiked up his hair, claiming he was the Don King of politics. Bill O’Rielly quoted Rocky Balboa’s trainer and asked Paul Ryan to eat lightening and crap thunder.
Restroom attendants did not report any unusual weather patterns.