CINCINATI, OHIO: Pampers launched a new product for Tri-State consumers: A Giants-branded diaper with an Eagles logo at the bottom of it. Now infant Giant fans who wear diapers can sh*t all over the Eagles, a favorite pastime of older Giants fans.
“This is a wonderful new product. It’s absorbent, it adjusts in size and it gives toddlers something to aim for.” Said the NY Giants General Manager, Jerry Reese. “Infants will undoubtedly have better aim than Eli Manning. He shit to bed this season and… oh, pardon the pun.”
The timing of the product launch took place the day before the Giants face the Eagles on Sunday, the 27th.
For older Giants fans, there is significant enthusiasm for the product. According to the makers of Depends, fan groups have requested the same product for themselves. “It sucks to wear incontinence products, but if you’re going to drop a deuce, I’d truly enjoy dropping one on the Eagles.”
A consumer survey revealed that 90% of the adult population would start wearing Depends if there was an opportunity to pinch a loaf on the Dallas Cowboys logo.